Those xxxx Primitives
by goodpie2
Summary: By the time humans contact the Turians, they have been in space for two hundred years, and are part of the Coalition of Sentient Races. When the Turians attack a science vessel for activating a Mass Relay, they discover that these "primitives" aren't so primitive.
1. Timeline and Codex of Species

Yes, it's yet another Mass Effect alternate history. Yes, it's going to focus on handing the Turians their asses for the first part. However, this one is a little different. I've spent a great deal of effort into coming up with completely new aliens, unlike anything anybody has ever thought of (except my dad, who helped me flesh them out). These aliens aren't just cranky humans, like Klingons, or blue psychic chicks, like Asari. Also, I've decided to get rid of the reapers, because I hate universe ending threats and races against time to save life as we know it and all that jazz. When you have Reapers, the entire story is about the Reapers, and there's no room to do anything else. As an added twist, the humans have some rather unique methods of travel.

I would like to thank Profartburger, author of Mass Effect: The First War, for getting me into the ME AU genre. I would like to thank my father for helping me create the Omicrons and the Thesi, and DavidWeber for getting me fascinated with the idea of a constitutional monarchy.

By the way, since I have no idea what kind of numbers I should use, I'm gonna use a lot less technobabble than most people seem to do when they write for ME. Get over it.

Lastly, due to the necessity of allowing Coalition technology and culture to advance, the ME timeline will be taking place much later.

This story is coauthored by my father. Because of the way we do it, each chapter will likely undergo a series of extensive rewrites. If there are any flaws, inconsistencies, or unclear points, _please point them out._

0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o

The Coalition: The Coalition is a unified body involving most of the peoples (There are small independent groups of each species) of the the most advanced sentient races of Gould belt (a large section of the Orion arm of the Milky Way Galaxy - Roughly equivalent to the canon Earth Alliance space.)The Coalition's leadership consists of a council, led by two heads of each species (the human monarch and Prime Minister are both members, the Thesian Clan Council elects a pair of leaders every six years, the Omicrons and AIs elect the leaders directly, and nobody knows how the dolphins choose their leaders) and a parliament, which is made up of elected members. The parliament has two houses. In one, members are elected by other members of their species. In the other, members are elected by the citizens of whatever planet they are a citizen of. It's a complicated system, but one that works.

History

100,000 years ago, a race known only as the Predecessors discovered the cycle of the Reapers. Knowing it was too late to save themselves, they spent their remaining time leaving warnings of the Reapers where future races would find them. When the Protheans discovered these warnings, they bent all of their research and resources towards finding a way to defeat the Reapers. Before the cycle could begin, the Protheans activated the Citadel Mass Relay, but in reverse- they went to Dark Space and eliminated the Reapers using a massive artificial black hole. The surviving Prothean civilization suffered massively from the use of resources put into combating the Reaper threat. Their civilization collapsed into a massive civil war, and the race went extinct, leaving an empty galaxy, to be filled in a way similar to the canon story. Because of the chaos of the time, these events are generally unknown, though myths and legends of the past can be found, usually without any real foundation. For whatever reason, none of the warnings of the Predecessors have survived to modern times.

In 2043, humans discover a ruined Prothean base on Mars. It is largely destroyed, and contains little useful information. From the look of the base, it had been the victim of some sort of attack. Worried that they may become victims of the same enemy that had destroyed the Prothean base, humans panic and almost destroy themselves in a global war. From the ashes rise a single government, the Kingdom of Humanity. It values exploration of space, military preparedness and a near religious hope for friendly contact with aliens. A constitutional monarchy, the Kingdom of Humanity's political power is equally divided between elected officials and a hereditary aristocracy**.** Further exploration of the solar system reveals the ruins of the Charon Mass Relay, presumably destroyed in the same attack as the one on the Prothean base.

In 2049, the Kingdom of Humanity is formed.

In 2053, a sentient AI, created during the war, successfully sues for citizenship in of the Kingdom of Humanity. Future legal decisions establish means of identifying sentient AIs, and permit them to become citizens (after the formation of the Coalition, AIs are permitted to choose which race they are considered a citizen of. Though not, by law, a permanent choice, so far, no AI has ever chosen to change).

In 2054, complete unity is achieved.

In 2087, the first ever FTL capable ship is made. Unfortunately, it is not enough to travel between systems on a regular basis- the trip still takes a number of weeks. Despite the travel times, the KoH begins colonizing a nearby planet, naming it Terra Nova.

In 2099 FTL communication is invented, requiring equipment at both ends.

In 2108, Doctor WayneEricson develops the first successful teleportation gate. Based on prior FTL principles, it also requires equipment at both ends of the transit. Due to the physics involved, it is not possible to transport especially massive objects (such as spacecraft) in this manner.

Now that humanity is capable of moving people and supplies very quickly, the colonization effort begins in earnest, stretching to include Eden Prime, and eventually Shanxi. Still wary of alien invaders, the Kingdom of Man continues to build up its military. Occasional piracy and rebellions give them opportunities for experience. Aware of their inability to travel quickly from place to place, and fearing other races may have found a way around this theoretical impossibility, they also build large defense stations orbiting colonized planets.

In 2118, first contact is made with the Omicrons. An alliance is formed.

In 2123, first contact is made with the Thesi. They enter the alliance with the humans and Omicrons. Human interaction with Thesi is difficult at first and the Omicrons were very important in avoiding war and even possible xenocide. After they were accepted into the alliance, several human religion based rebellions had to be put down.

In 2204, the three races combine under a single banner, known as the Coalition of Sentient Races. Each species' government remains autonomous to some extent, but the differences between the species increase the value in joint efforts in colinization. The Planets colonized as joint efforts take on qualities very different than other planets, strengthening the coalition. They also prosper very quickly, supporting the new, unified, ideas. The strong philosophy of "Unity" brought to the Coalition by the KoH also leads to strong efforts supporting the integration of military forces.

In 2211, an Omicron science team studying Earth wildlife translates the language of the dolphins, making it clear that they are fully sentient. After much debate, reparations are made to dolphins for past wrongs, and the dolphins are invited to join the Coalition of Sentient Races. Many coastal cities begin building canals and underwater buildings so that dolphins can become fully integrated members of society. This tends to break down residual efforts by some parts of humanity to remain racist, and such sects, among any of the members, tend to be isolated and backward.

In 2214, the Artificial Republic is founded. The Artificial Republic governs all Artificial Intelligences, and all sentient AIs are citizens. Once the AR was founded, AIs were no longer citizens in other governments. The AR is a direct republic, and all decisions are made by all citizens.

In 2253, the Coalition decides to make stronger efforts to assist ancient adult Omicrons to other planets. This results in healthier, more stable juveniles. It has a side effect of pushing research in increasing the maximum mass transit of the teleportation gates. The Omicrons usually choose to live in large forests near the entrances to major cities, though some are willing to live in large city parks, especially if they have experienced the high esteem the Humans and Thesi tend to give them.*

In 2257, the Shanxi Mass Relay is discovered. Recognizing it as being the same kind of device as the ruined one in the SolSystem, the Coalition sends a science vessel, accompanied by three frigates and a cruiser.

By the year 2257, the Coalition of Sentient Races has over 40 colony worlds, with Terra Nova and Shanxi being the most populous Shanxi has nearly a billion citizens, including large forests of Omicrons planted outside of cities and in parks, and a small number of dolphins. The CSN (Coalition Space Navy) has twenty-three dreadnoughts, two superdreadnoughts, thirteen carriers, three supercarriers, and hundreds of destroyers, cruisers, and frigates.

0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o

Codex

Humans: A bipedal, bigendered race, they are clever, resourceful, and kinda badass.

Dolphins: Little is known about the dolphins despite their decades as a Coalition race. They take very little seriously, and their culture seems to be almost entirely based on what is fun to do. Of course, studying their culture is extremely difficult. Anything they say can, and usually does, have several meanings, many of which are usually nonsensical and/or humorous. Humans and Thesi struggle with the fact that the Elders (ancient Omicrons) seem to understand them best, since, to these two groups, the Elders do not have any sense of humor.

Omicron: A race of sentient plants. First contact made in 2118. Omicrons have a three part life cycle. A seed is planted, and grows into a seedling. The seedling grows for three years. A seedling is treated much like a human fetus, and they are heavily guarded and protected by the adults and juveniles. It grows until it has reached the size of a small dog. Once the seedling is fully developed, its roots wither and die, and the seedling uproots itself. It is now a juvenile. The juvenile is not sentient, and is completely dependent on the adults for organization and direction. Effectively, the adults are their brains. The juveniles slowly increase in size and intelligence until they reach adulthood, at which point they are roughly the size of a human tank, and are fully sentient. Juveniles serve as workers and warriors. They have eight legs, the front two of which come to a fine point and are highly dextrous. They have two arms, with one large claw and one smaller one, for manipulation on a large scale and for the use of tools, as well as for combat. They also have tendrils around their faces, which are used for fine manipulation of items and tools. Juvenile Omicrons are dependent on their adults, they can only perform simple tasks. Upon reaching adulthood, the juveniles put down roots, and their trunks begin to grow out of their bodies. They combine minds with the Omicrons directly around them and, though they maintain their individuality and are separate beings, they seem to form an additional hive mind. The combination of minds allows for quick communication across large distances. The adults are thinkers and researchers. An adult Omicron can live for centuries, and can grow to enormous sizes.

Like many creatures on their planet, the omicrons have minor telepathy, which they can use to control the juveniles. This telepathy does not allow them to communicate with nontelepathic creatures, however, since they lack a way to receive the signal.

Due to their hive mind, Omicrons are highly democratic, and originally found the monarchy of the humans to be repulsive, and the clan council of the Thesi to be archaic, but have since learned to appreciate the differences in the cultures of the other Coalition races, even if they cannot understand them.

Thesus: A race of tri-gendered snake beings. First contact made in 2123.

Echidna- Echidna serve as clan leaders. They are all female, and are roughly human sized. They are highly intelligent and live for centuries. They are very similar to a queen bee in that they lay eggs and govern the clan. They have a fully developed face and roughly humanoid torso (although it does not appear to be female, and still has scales), with four arms with six fingers. The fingers on the lower two hands are clawed.

Warriors: The warriors are similar to echidna, but are sterile, and are actually a completely separate gender. Despite the name "warriors," they are no longer limited to being soldiers but may work in material industry, service industry, though they do comprise a large portion of the armed forces.

Males: The males look like small snakes with tiny hooked grooves on either side of their bodies, which allow them to grip onto objects when they coil around them. They are roughly three feet long, and about three inches around. While they are small, they are highly intelligent and fully sentient. Due to their lack of limbs, there is a sizable industry in the Coalition based on creating equipment which they can use, and they have a separate branch of the military, known as the Snake Corps.

All Thesi have a venemous bite, and the claws of the echidna and warriors are also venemous.

The government of the thesi is a clan council formed of the echidna from each clan. Since joining the Coalition of Sentient Races, the clan council is led by two echidna which the council elects to represent them in the Coalition council.

Despite their snakelike appearance, the Thesian language is actually very guttural, and there is no excessive hissing.

0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o

*(A variety of xenosociological theories attempt to explain this phenomenon, which tends to amuse the "Elders". See "A walk in a Park – conversations with the oldest", "JoyceKilner, a prophetic poet", and dfkleee - No truly adequate translation outside of Thesi languages exists. Attempts have sometimes caused civil disturbances. The best translation of title is "a great climb")


	2. Meet the Turians

Despite the fact that I broke my promise to not do excessive research for this story, I was unable to find very many names for the veterans of the First Contact War, and I couldn't figure out who did what for the names I _could _find, so I'm making it up.

Because we've all read the story of the Relay 314 Incident a million times, I'm not going to write it in detail. I will, however, provide a summary of the events with the specifics and changes for this story.

A Coalition science vessel, accompanied by three frigates, a cruiser, and a dozen fighters, went to study the alien artifact located in the Shanxi system. During the investigation, one of the scientists accidentally activated the artifact. A turian patrol that had been in the area looking for a top secret prototype ship that had crash-landed, spotted this and opened fire on the science vessel, which was destroyed with all hands. The protection detail, led by Captain Anderson of the CSNS cruiser Fearless, retaliated. The turian Mass Accelerator rounds were largely ineffective against the armor of the Coalition Space Navy Ships, and the AIs in charge of the ships' point defense and Electronic Warfare systems were able to take down or distract most of the disruptor torpedoes. Despite the technological advantages of the CSN ships, the turian advantage in numbers allowed them to destroy all three of the frigates and severely damage the Fearless. The Fearless was forced to retreat. Turian forces studied the system and located Shanxi. Believing it to be the homeworld of their enemy forces, the turians withdrew to Palaven to inform their superiors. The Coalition fleet retrieved as much information as possible from the enemy databanks and withdrew as well. Over the next few days, the Coalition AIs managed to learn much of the information stored in the enemy computers, and form a rough translation program for Turian and Asari, and a less passable one for Salarian and Quarian.

0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o

"Do you mind explaining exactly how you managed to lose a cruiser and five frigates in a simple police action against a race of primitives that doesn't even have kinetic barriers? Or even Element Zero, for that matter?" Primarch Fedorian asked.

Admiral Therus Kerussan sighed, and looked at his superior.

"It seems that they use some form of primitive magnetic acceleration for their weapons, rather than Mass Accelerators. The projectiles that their weapons fire are slow enough and large enough that our kinetic barriers don't stop them. Once they impact our ships, their projectiles are so massive that they simply tear right through them. As for their lack of kinetic barriers, it's irrelevant. Our Mass Accelerator slugs are designed to flatten and spread on impact in order to maximize the energy transfer. However, since the primitives lack shields, their ships are far more heavily armored than ours are. The slugs simply flatten themselves on the primitives' armor. The only weapon we have that does damage to them is disruptor torpedoes, and their point defense is extraordinarily effective, and for some reason, a great deal of our missiles miss entirely. We were only able to damage them by flooding them with torpedoes."

The Primarch thought about this for a few minutes, then nodded. "Very +well. These primitives are clearly dangerous. Any race foolish enough to activate a Mass Relay without knowing what's on the other side must be subjugated for the safety of the galaxy. You are to take the First and Third Fleets and subdue these creatures. Once they have been suitably cowed, we will make them into a client race."

"I understand," Admiral Kerussan responded.

"Good. You are dismissed." The Primarch said.

Kerussan saluted, then left the audience chamber to prepare for the invasion.

0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o

Admiral Frank Cortez looked at the hologrid showing his forces and swore under his breath. He had one carrier, one dreadnought, fifteen cruisers, and forty frigates with which to protect one of the most populated colonies in Coalition space. Those _damn _politicians had decided that Earth, Terra Nova, and Eden Prime were higher priorities, and so had only left a picket defense at Shanxi. Now they might suffer for that decision.. The Coalition Council of Leaders had decided that the aliens were likely to launch an attack on Shanxi. Because of that, it was Cortez's job to defend the colony until reinforcements arrived. Unfortunately, the nearest fleet was three weeks travel away from Shanxi, which meant that Cortez was on his own.

"Contact!" yelled the sensors officer of the CSNS Indestructible, Cortez's flagship (a dreadnought). "Alien ships have appeared at the artifact! A hundred ships and counting!"

Cortez watched as ship after ship poured into the system.

_This,_he thought, _is not good._

0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o

"Enemy sighted, sir." Phinintus Lithius, Admiral Kerussan's tactical officer, said. "I'm counting forty cruisers, fifteen ships larger than those, and... my god... one ship four kilometers long, and one ship about three kilometers long. The smaller one appears to be a support ship, by its position."

"What kind of species builds a support ship three kilometers long?" the com officer asked.

"I don't know," the admiral responded, "but they clearly put all of their resources into making them, because they don't have much else. The larger ship is to be designated Bogey one, and the smaller ship is Bogey Two. Bogey one will be our first target. It's clearly the primitives' most important and most powerful ship. I want all four of our dreadnoughts and their screens to focus on taking that ship out as quickly as possible. Other ships are to engage at will, but to maintain formation. Once we've taken out bogey one, they shouldn't be able to put up much of a fight."

Kerussan waited as his ships continued to enter the system, when suddenly...

"Sir, they're hailing us," called the com officer.

"Put them on the main display. Let's find out what these primitives look like."

"Onscreen," said the com officer, turning on the main display.

An pink alien, bearing a striking resemblance to what the admiral imagined a male asari would look like if it had fur on its chin, appeared on the screen.

"Unknown fleet," the alien said, and Admiral Kerussan was surprised to hear that it was speaking in passable Turian, "this is Admiral Frank Cortez of the Coalition Space Navy. You are violating Coalition space, and have already attacked an unarmed research vessel and several military ships. This alone is enough to be considered an act of war. However, if you power down your weapons now, we are willing to negotiate peace."

"Admiral Cortez, your ships were found breaking Council law, and their destructions were a necessary legal recourse. However, since your race is clearly new to space, and unfamiliar with Council regulations, we will give you a chance to offer your unconditional surrender, and allow you to become a client race of the turian Hierarchy. If you do not surrender, your ships will be destroyed and we will begin occupation of your world."

For a moment, the alien didn't respond, and then he scowled and, with five words, the war officially began.

"Nuts." In the background, Kerussan could hear one of the aliens burst into laughter.

"I'm sorry, my translator seems to have malfunctioned. I heard 'nuts.'" Kerussan said. "Is that a negative, or a positive?"

"Nuts is _strictly _negative," answered the alien. In the background, the laughter intensified, and the screen went blank.

Kerussan stared in shock. He couldn't believe it! The primitive couldn't possibly think that his tiny little fleet could win, and yet he'd refused to surrender!

"Sir! Enemy ships have opened fire! Bogey two is deploying thousands of fighters!"

"Activate the GARDIAN systems," said Kerussan lazily. _This is going to be even easier than we expected,_the admiral thought to himself. _What kind of an idiot devotes that many resources to building _fighters _of all things? T__he GARDIANs will tear straight through them, and since the fighters seem to make up half their fleet's firepower, the primitives will be helpless after that._

Then something happened that made Kerussan blink. Each fighter fired three missiles, all at the exact same time.

"Sir," asked Ephan Vakarian, his navigations officer, "how can ships that small fire three missiles at once?"

"They can't. I don't know. It's impossible," stammered the turian admiral.

A few seconds later, he was snapped back into his senses as several frigates and cruisers abruptly exploded.

"Open fire!" He said. "As I said, focus on Bogey one. Activate the GARDIAN systems, and all ships are to release fighters. Fighters are to remain within support range of the GARDIAN systems and engage enemy fighters."

His men obeyed, and after a few moments the hangar doors on each ship opened to reveal a total of 450 fighters and interceptors. The fighters flew from the hangars to form a protective screen around the larger, more important ships, with the interceptors scattered in front of them.

0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o

Cortez watched in amazement as a handful of fighters came out of the enemy ships and spread themselves out in front of the bigger ships. Was that really all they carried? In a fleet this size, they should have had at least a few thousand. Unless... was it possible that they'd never thought to use fighters on a large scale? That certainly seemed to be the case. Whatever the reason, it provided his navy with a major advantage- one that he didn't intend to waste.

"Roger," he asked, "have you managed to hack their communications yet?"

"Yes sir," responded Roger, the ship's AI. "I've also managed to figure out their command structure. This," a specific ship on the hologrid, towards the middle of the enormous fleet, highlighted in red, "is their commander's flagship. These," a large group of ships highlighted in blue, " are other important ships in their command structure."

"Good. Designate the flagship Enemy One, and have fighter squadrons one through ten work on taking out that ship and its screen. Cruiser Squadron One is to help them. The rest of the fleet is to focus on the command structure and their screens."

"Yes sir, transmitting orders now," answered the AI.

0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o

Kerussan swore as yet another group of fighters descended on his ship. How the _hell_ had the primitives managed to figure out his command structure? It shouldn't have been possible!

But clearly they had, because the primitives were focusing on _his_ ship and the other ships carrying high ranking officers, completely ignoring everything else.

"Sir, the engine's down! That last fighter run has us crippled. We're sitting ducks, now," said Lithius.

The fighters were another issue. The whole situation was very confusing. There were fighters _everywhere. _Far more than it was physically possible for the enemy ships to have launched. Sometimes, they would shoot down one of the fighters, and it would be as if nothing had been there at all. Other times, a fighter would fly straight into their ships, and nothing would happen.

The worst, though, the absolute _worst,_ was whenever they started to take out a ship. As soon as it was obvious that an enemy ship was going to die, it would turn on its engines and ram the nearest turian ship, finishing with a nuclear blast. That had been terrifying, at first- the idea that these people were so committed to a losing battle that they would commit suicide in order to harm their enemy rather than surrender was unbelievable.

Kerussan sighed. _This was supposed to be _simple, _dammit!_He thought to himself. _We come in, we show our fleet, they put up a token defense, and they surrender once it becomes clear that they can't win. Instead, they're actually putting up a fight! They still won't win, and they know it, but they're inflicting far more damage than they should._

On some level, he respected the primitives for not giving up their world without a fight. Mostly, however, he just found them to be an annoying, upstart little race that didn't know when it was going to lose.

0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o

It took hours, but eventually the primitives _did _lose. Admiral Kerussan even managed to survive and save nearly half of his command structure by putting the most important ships inside large clusters of cruisers and frigates (the fighters and interceptors all died within minutes, so he couldn't use them.) Overall, the casualties hadn't been too high- there just hadn't been enough "Coalition" ships, but the ships they _had_destroyed had all been carrying their most skilled and experienced commanders. Kerussan still didn't know how they'd managed to find out which ships to destroy, but CIC's estimation was that the primitives had somehow found a way to hack the turian communications. Now he could _finally _deploy the shuttles with the army and marines, and then the fight would be in General Desolas' hands.

"Sir? We're detecting a large number of defense satellites around the planet," Vakarian said. "CIC's estimate is that if we try to land the shuttles without taking out at least a third of the satellites, the landing force will suffer at least seventy percent casualties."

"Spirits damn it!" Kerussan finally lost his temper. Couldn't these primitives just _die already?_"Fine," he growled. "Move to engage the satellites. Attack from maximum effective range."

"Yes sir. Moving to engage."

It took another hour, and a quarter of his remaining force, but Kerussan's fleet eventually tore a big enough hole in the satellite net that the ground forces could safely land.

"General Desolas," he said, once he'd opened the com. "You are clear to launch your forces. Show these primitives what happens when they pick a fight with the turian Hierarchy."

"Yes sir," the general grinned. "Launching shuttles."

0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o

Interestingly enough, Desolas wasn't the only general who grinned at this command. General Williams of the Coalition Army was listening in to the enemy communications, and he was looking forward to kicking some alien ass. Yes, the turians had managed to destroy the defense fleet, but that had been expected from the moment they saw the size of the enemy fleet, and the loss of life had been low, thanks to the teleportation gates found in each ship. The land battle, however, was expected to go completely differently.

Thanks to the Coalition's teleportation fields, the civilians had all been evacuated as soon as it had been announced that the turians were likely to attack Shanxi, and the remaining time had been spent reinforcing the army and preparing for the attack. Military bases were fortified to hell and back, and cities had been turned into veritable death traps. There were barriers at every corner, mines throughout the roads, waiting to be armed by a signal from HQ, snipers in every building, explosives in every car. And that was if the turians even managed to _enter _the cities and military bases. Most cities and _all _military bases had large forests of omicrons around them, and that was possibly the deadliest trap yet. As many omicrons as could be equipped had an octuple -barreled shotgun, with a tiny juvenile who had been trained to aim and load it, or an antipersonnel turret mounted on its back. Male Thesi, mostly members of the Snake Corps*, but also volunteers who had just wanted to fight the enemy, were hiding in the omicrons' branches and in tunnel networks**, ready to attack the turians from above and below (they could only pray that thesus poison was as deadly to turians as it was to nearly every other living thing). Guerilla units of warrior thesi and humans were deployed, and teams of omibadgers*** had been placed in burrows near the edge of the forest.

0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o

Makgureth Oktur grinned and hefted her shotguns as she (technically, she wasn't a she- as a warrior thesus, she was a member of a separate gender, but the English language doesn't have a pronoun for that) watched the turians pour out of the smoking dropship. It was the first one in her area to get past the anti-air turrets and missiles, which meant that she was finally going to get a fight.

As soon as the shuttle had landed, her platoon had been deployed to the edge of the omicron forest to harass the turian troops. She looked at her warriors, and nodded to Hank, the squad's sniper, who was perched on the back of an enormous juvenile omicron some ways away. Hank had spent the past ten minutes watching the turians to figure out which ones were the commanders, and he had his targets all picked out. As soon Hank caught her nod, he began eliminating those targets.

0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o

Lieutenant Octus Korel jumped as the captain's head exploded in the middle of his sentence.

"Sniper! Get down!" someone yelled, and Octus dove for cover as another officer fell. He found himself and three other turians behind a pile of crates, and listened to the sound of gunfire, trying to figure out what to do. The soldier to his left peered around the corner and opened fire for a few seconds before pulling back into shelter.

"I spotted him, sir," the soldier said. "He's sitting on top of one of those weird trees at the edge of the forest, in that general direction," he pointed.

Before Octus could respond, a small, green egg bounced over the crates they were hiding behind. Realizing it was probably a grenade, Octus scooped it up and threw it back over the crate in the direction the soldier had been pointing. There was some yelling, and the shooting stopped for a moment, and then there was a large explosion. Grabbing his assault rifle, Octus stood up and opened fire.

0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o

Makgureth swore as she saw her grenade head back towards them.

"Get down!" She yelled to her squad, taking cover behind the trunk of an adult omicron before the grenade exploded.

"Did anybody get hurt?" she asked the omicron, knowing that his link to the other trees would give him an accurate status report.

"I'm afraid," said his slow, deep, synthetic voice (omicrons couldn't speak naturally, and so relied on electronics to communicate with other species), "that Private Jensen has joined the soil."

Makgureth swore again, and then a third time as she heard enemy fire begin in earnest. Her platoon wasn't meant for sustained combat, they were a harassment team, meant to strike fast and withdraw before the enemy could get their bearings.

"Okay, people, time to fall back," she said into her helmet com. Then, to the omicron, "Give 'em hell, buddy."

"We fully intend to," the tree said, waving it's smaller claw in farewell as she slithered away, followed by the humans, warrior thesi, and juvenile omicrons in her platoon.

0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o

The omicron waited, still as only a tree can be (although Samen, the adult in charge of this group of omicrons, did have to stop some of the more eager juveniles from moving their claws), as the turians entered the forest. Then, at a signal from one of the adults, it let loose with all eight barrels of its shotgun and lashed out with its claws. Its bigger claw grabbed onto a pair of turians and quickly cut them in half, while its smaller one cut through the neck of a third. At the same instant, every other omicron in the forest attacked as well.

"Attack!" the adult bellowed in its deep, synthetic voice. As soon as they heard the command, dozens of thesi jumped from branches and limbs onto the turians, and dozens more came out of the tunnels they had been hiding in. Thesi climbed up the bodies of the turians, coiling around their unprotected necks (can anybody explain why the hell they don't wear helmets?) and slitting their throats with the sharp hooks lining their bodies, or simply biting them and injecting their deadly venom. Omicrons lashed out with their claws, cutting Turians in half, or picking them up and using them as weapons. Whenever an omicron could get a shot without risking harm to a thesus, he would let loose with one or more of the barrels of his shotgun, and a turian would fall.

The turians fought valiantly, but their weapons couldn't harm the tree-like omicrons, and they couldn't shoot the thesi climbing all over them for fear of hitting an ally.

Eventually, these strange new enemies, combined with their inability to effectively combat them, were too much for them to handle, and for the first time in centuries, the turians broke ranks and _ran. _They ran as fast as they could towards their shuttle. As the edge of the forest came in sight, omicrons sent the signal to the omibadgers to attack. The vicious creatures burst from their burrows, and tore into the turian ranks, body armor deflecting bullets, and claws eviscerating their enemies. All over the planet, omicrons cheered as their brethren harassed the turians all the way to the edge of the forest, while the slow moving thesi fell back into their positions to await the next attack.

0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o

*The Snake Corps is a specialized military unit composed of male thesi. The Snake Corps soldiers are equiped with metal sheaths on their fangs (although they lack a tip so that venom can still be injected), and the hooks on the sides of the thesi's body are coated in metal, strengthening and sharpening them. In addition, many Snake Corps members have light armor on their backs. It's not enough to protect them from a gunshot, but it does a decent job of keeping enemy melee weapons from harming them.

**The thesi and omicrons quickly formed a close bond, and many thesi live in apartment complexes located underneath the omicron forests. These complexes are divided into two sections- one section with large rooms for warriors and echidna (and any human who chooses to live there), and another, smaller section for the males. The latter section also has many tunnels to the surface, allowing the males to visit their arboreal friends without having to go through the main entrance to the complex.

***Omibadgers are creatures native to the omicrons' homeworld. Since the omibadgers posses slight telepathic powers, the omicrons are able to exert some level of control over them through a psychic link. The two species have a symbiotic relationship the omibadgers build burrows under adult omicrons, and the omibadgers help protect the omicrons' seedlings and younger juveniles. Since they are just as vicious as the Earth creatures they resemble, trained omibadger teams are often part of the military, similar to K9 units.


End file.
